


Truth or Dare

by Xochiquetzl



Series: Games [2]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-05-13
Updated: 2001-05-13
Packaged: 2017-10-04 23:11:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/35110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xochiquetzl/pseuds/Xochiquetzl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>More secrets are revealed when SG-1 plays "Truth or Dare."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Truth or Dare

"There is no alcohol involved in this game?" Teal'c asked. Again.

"No, no alcohol, but it's even more embarrassing than 'I never,'" Daniel groaned melodramatically, flopping into a chair. "I think it's a terrible idea. Don't you think you guys collected enough blackmail material playing 'I never'?" Daniel complained.

"Hey, if we've already dug up all your dirt what do you have to lose?" Jack retorted.

"There are always new opportunities for public humiliation, Jack. 'Spin the bottle' would be less embarrassing."

Jack sighed. "You didn't have **any** fun playing 'I never'?"

"I didn't say that," Daniel said carefully. "I just think I'll be more inhibited sharing my deep dark secrets sober."

"Point of protocol," Sam asked. "Are we playing the version where everyone has to answer each question, or the version where you choose who answers?"

"The version I played in college said you could do either, but if you chose everyone must answer you had to answer yourself," Daniel suggested. "Of course, everyone took the opportunity to pick on me," he added.

"Why 'of course'?" Jack asked.

"Because he was playing with people asking stuff like 'Is there anyone at this table you want to have hot, nasty sex with?'" Sam said promptly.

"Good question," Jack admitted. "So, Daniel, is there anyone..."

"**Nobody** asked me that!" Daniel protested indignantly.

"How many beers will it take to get you drunk and lure you into my bed so we can fuck like hot, sweaty minks?" Jack asked, smirking at a seething Daniel. "Just a random example," he added innocently. "Cheapest date in town," he murmured confidentially to Sam and Teal'c. "One beer and he's anybody's." He beamed at Daniel.

"Wanna beer?" Jack and Sam chorused brightly.

Daniel blushed, then sniggered meanly as Jack did a double take and scowled ferociously at an ostentatiously 'innocent' Sam. Daniel was **off** the market, and Jack wondered if he could make that obvious without letting anyone know it was him.

"I still do not understand the rules," Teal'c observed, taking pity on Daniel.

"I think we should go for Daniel's rules," Sam suggested brightly, still refusing to meet the colonel's flinty eyes.

"In which case, the game proceeds like this, Teal'c: someone asks you if you would prefer 'truth or dare.' You have to decide before you know what the question or dare is. If you choose truth, they ask you a question, probably of an embarrassing sexual nature. If you choose dare, they try to come up with something equally evil that you have to do." Daniel sighed.

"Are all the Tau'ri obsessed with sex?" Teal'c asked.

"We're young and horny," Jack commented, which seemed to satisfy Teal'c.

"If it's a question for everyone there's no dare, unless we want to amend that rule..."

"Does this mean you're playing?" Jack asked.

"I guess if I'm the only one who doesn't want to I shouldn't be a wet blanket," Daniel grumbled.

"You don't have to," Sam said quickly.

"I dunno," Daniel said, "Jack seemed to emerge from 'I never' relatively unscathed. Maybe I should pick on him."

"'Unscathed'? What about my deep dark General Hospital secret?"

"Teal'c?" Sam asked. Teal'c inclined his head solemnly. "Daniel? do you want to start?"

"Not really," Daniel answered.

"Okay. Truth or dare, Daniel?" Sam asked.

"Oh dear," Daniel said. "Oh dear. Which would be worse?" He eyed Sam appraisingly. "Truth," he winced.

"'Spin the bottle'?" Sam asked, snickering.

"Well, if we're going to go for juvenile and humiliating..." Daniel blushed.

"Fair enough," Sam said. "Sir?"

"I have a question for everyone," Jack said. "Tell us about losing your virginity." A collective groan went around. "I was at a high school party with spiked punch, and my date and I went and locked ourselves in the bathroom and..."

"Wow, trust Jack to immediately drag the tone down to the gutter," Daniel grumbled.

"We're playing Truth or Dare," Jack retorted. "Isn't that the point?"

"Yeah, well," Sam started. "Remind me why I thought this was a good idea?" She sighed. "It was with my boyfriend at the academy. We just decided it was time and went to a motel."

"Was it great? Did it suck?" Jack prodded.

"What about yours?" Sam retorted.

"I had fun, but she immediately broke up with me, so I took that as a critical review," Jack admitted.

"It was okay," Sam said. "The earth didn't move or anything."

"Daniel?" Jack prodded. "Your turn."

"I believe I mentioned that I'd had a boyfriend," Daniel said. "Well, we had the 'I like you a lot' conversation, a lot, then I thought about it for less than three months before depositing myself in his doorway..." Daniel paused self-consciously. "He... um... wasn't expecting me."

"I'll bet," Jack chuckled. "How much did he have to pay his roommate to leave?"

"Awww, that sounds sweet," Sam said.

"It was," Daniel admitted, blushing.

"Okay, Teal'c?" Jack interrupted.

"I had sex with a woman. It was enjoyable," Teal'c proclaimed solemnly.

"Uh, okay, would you care to elaborate on that?" Jack asked.

"I would not," Teal'c stated emphatically.

"Alrighty then," Jack said. He considered challenging Teal'c further, then shrugged. "Your turn, Teal'c."

Daniel grumbled audibly.

"Truth or dare, O'Neill?" Teal'c asked.

"Truth," Jack answered.

"Did you follow the advice I gave you last weekend?"

Jack blushed about forty-seven shades of red. "Yes, I did, Teal'c, thanks for asking. Danny, your turn."

"What advice was that?" Sam asked.

"I believe it's Daniel's turn to ask a question, Carter," Jack evaded.

"Truth or dare, Jack?" Daniel asked.

"Truth," Jack answered.

"How many sexual partners have you had?"

"How many have you had?"

"Excuse me, but it's **my** turn to ask a question!"

"I forget."

"I beg your pardon?" Daniel objected. "How do you 'forget'?"

Jack gave Daniel a dirty look. "Well, it's a large number," Jack admitted.

"How about an estimate?" Sam suggested.

"Does the term 'cast of thousands' ring a bell?"

"You're joking," Sam said, visibly horrified.

"Ya think?" Jack retorted, then admitted, "I was a bad, bad boy before I got married. Townies. Bars."

"Now, see, I've never done that. The whole idea just fills me with profound social anxiety," Daniel admitted.

"Do you even own a mirror?" Sam asked Daniel, exasperated.

"Um, yeah, but it's not like I go to brush my teeth and become wildly aroused at the sight of myself," Daniel said. "Besides, the whole being able to pick people up thing kind of assumes one is not, well, me."

"You really don't own a mirror, do you?" Jack asked, disbelieving.

"I don't mean I need a paper bag over my head. I mean, um, no offense, but... ew."

"'Ew'?" Jack asked.

"Sex isn't like that for me. It's not about... well, it just doesn't sound fun." Daniel looked around. "Aren't we still playing 'Truth or Dare'?"

"I have a question for everyone" Sam announced. "I just received an invitation to a high school reunion, and I want to know if everyone would go. Sir?"

"Isn't the whole idea of a high school reunion to impress your former classmates?" Jack asked. "If I tell anyone what I do for a living, I'd have to shoot them. I think I'll pass on that whole reunion experience."

"Teal'c, do they have anything like high school reunions on Chulak? Jaffa training reunions?" Sam asked.

"They do not."

"If they held one, would you go?" Sam persisted.

"No."

"Okay, Daniel?" Sam asked.

"If I went, you know that cute girl I had a crush on in eleventh grade would immediately become a Goa'uld host, don't you? I think I should spare her that," Daniel said drily.

"I'd go," Sam interjected, "if General Hammond would lend me his shoulder boards and Daniel would pretend to be my trophy husband. Otherwise, forget it."

_Trophy husband?_ Jack thought. _I don't care if people think you're doing the wild thing, but if this charade involves touching him, you're DEAD._

"Trophy husband?" Daniel asked. "I'm not sure how that works."

"Tell them you stripped your way through graduate school," Sam suggested.

"So, to be a trophy husband I should wear something skimpy and tell people I'm a nuclear physicist. Hmm, sounds like the stereotypical female science fiction character."

Sam burst out laughing.

"Although, assuming they bought this in the first place, which is unlikely in my opinion, I think the charade would be over as soon as they started asking questions. Like, say, what songs I stripped to," Daniel commented.

"Meatloaf, 'Paradise by the Dashboard Light,'" Jack suggested with an evil grin.

"Gilbert and Sullivan, 'Modern Major General,'" Daniel suggested.

"Do not tell them the name of any song. Merely inform them that information will cost a dollar, inserted into your waistband," Teal'c suggested.

"Ew," Daniel said, shuddering. "Sorry, Sam, but..."

"Maybe we should forget the stripping," Sam said, then sighed. "Another perfectly good high school revenge fantasy, ruined."

"Sorry," Daniel said. "I really do feel your pain."

"Cars, sleeping in class, smoking in the boy's room, and chasing girls," Jack said. "And underage drinking. That's what high school was all about!"

"It all sounds so wholesome. And nothing like the high school experience **I** remember," Daniel contradicted.

"'Ambition, distraction, uglification, and derision,'" Sam said.

"That was funny," Jack said.

"It was Lewis Carroll," Sam admitted.

"So, Daniel, truth or dare?"

"You're going to ask me that number of sexual partners question, aren't you?" Daniel asked. "Well, I'm on to you. Dare, flyboy."

"Well, Space Monkey, I couldn't help but notice in the locker room... Show us your neck."

Daniel blushed spectacularly, wondering what in the hell Jack was thinking, and moved his shirt collar, displaying an impressive array of hickeys.

"Are those hickeys?" Sam asked.

"Yes," Daniel admitted, blush deepening.

"I didn't know you were seeing anyone," Sam said. "Who's the lucky... girl? boy? person?"

"Um, I don't think that's covered in the dare."

"Me, either," Jack said, adding, as Sam looked over suspiciously, "Too bad."

Sam gave Jack a long, appraising look. Jack gave Sam his best dumb look. "Sir, did you give Daniel hickeys?"

"Oh, for crying out loud, Carter! If I did, do you think I would have him show them to you? How dumb do you think I am?" Jack rolled his eyes.

"Truth or dare, DanielJackson?" Teal'c asked, interrupting.

"Uh," Daniel said. "Truth."

"Are you seeing more than one person at the moment?"

"Just the one person! I'm kind of a one-person kind of guy." He looked at Sam, who was still sizing up Jack's poker face. "Truth or dare, Sam?"

"Dare," Sam said.

"Show us what's in your briefcase," Daniel said.

Sam opened her briefcase. "Nothing too exciting. My laptop, some scientific journals..." Sam blushed slightly. "And, of course, my trusty DVD of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom."

"You know, I could just pop off into the other room and dress up like Indiana Jones if it would liven up the evening..." Jack offered.

"Oh, could you?" Daniel asked.

Jack considered this for a moment. "You know, Daniel could just pop off into the other room and dress up like Indiana Jones if it would liven up the evening..." Jack offered.

"Truth or dare, sir?" Sam interrupted.

"Dare," Jack answered.

"Show us your neck so we can see if **you** have any hickeys," Sam challenged.

Jack pulled his shirt aside. "See?" he said. "No hickeys. My turn? Truth or Dare, Daniel?"

"Truth."

"Is that honey and whipped cream in your refrigerator for dessert or a hot date?"

Daniel sputtered indignantly.

"Lucky date," Jack observed smugly. "What did you say his name was again?"

"Actually, I find that honey tends to leave itchy sugar crystals in annoying places. It's for dessert," Daniel said. "The other depends on... um, it depends," he blushed.

"Truth or dare, O'Neill?" Teal'c asked.

"Truth."

"Are you certain it is polite to be so inquisitive into DanielJackson's affairs?"

"It's just Truth or Dare, Teal'c."

"I think we should break this up," Daniel suggested.

"Who are you seeing, Daniel?" Sam asked.

"I'm not going tell you that!"

"Why not?"

"I'm just not."

"Why not?"

"Geeze, Carter, lay off, will ya?" Jack sighed.

"Why is it okay for you to make his personal life the subject of a party game but not me?" Sam asked pointedly. She waited for an answer. She didn't get one. There was a long, uncomfortable silence, during which neither Jack nor Daniel would look at her.

Oh.

Great. Just great. She'd gotten stinking drunk last week playing "I never," and admitted to Colonel O'Neill that she'd decided she didn't want to pursue him because he wasn't over his wife. Then there was that "You ever think, you and Daniel?" conversation that she took as tacit encouragement. Then, when she'd decided that maybe, just maybe, if something worked out with Daniel she just might not feel like the consolation prize, it turned out that Colonel O'Neill was over his wife enough to... to...

Colonel O'Neill couldn't have come up with anything more hurtful if he'd planned it. Well, she wasn't going to admit that. Not in a million years. Not to Colonel O'Neill, at any rate. Ever.

This had better be love. If this was Colonel Cast-of-thousands taking advantage of Daniel, she'd shove the Colonel into an incoming wormhole. And Teal'c would help her.

What in the hell was he thinking? What, she wasn't enough of a finger flip to the regs, so he had to go one better by switching teams? You don't screw people under your command. It's just wrong. At least it had been wrong when it had been her instead of Daniel. Sam took a deep breath and counted to ten. No, sex with people under your command was still wrong. And as his second-in-command, she was going to have to say something. Lucky her.

Sam composed her face and her voice as best as she could. "I see you didn't take **my** advice last weekend, sir!"

Jack groaned and buried his face in his hands.

"He was following **my** advice," Teal'c interjected.

"And I can't believe **you** encouraged him!" She glared at Teal'c. Teal'c should be on **her** side!

"Excuse me," Daniel interjected. "You asked both Sam and Teal'c whether we should sleep together?" he snapped at Jack, hurt.

"No, both Sam and Teal'c offered their completely unsolicited advice on whether we should sleep together," Jack clarified, voice muffled behind his hands. "If it's any comfort, they both think you're too good for me."

"Well, that's certainly true," Daniel teased. "'Cast of thousands.'"

Jack snickered.

"Sir," Sam started.

"Carter, mind your own damn business!"

"As your second-in-command, it's my duty to point out when you're doing something stupid," Sam contradicted.

"I'll try not to take that personally," Daniel interjected.

"Oh, trust me, Daniel--my concerns all go in the other direction."

"I'll try not to take that personally," Jack drawled sarcastically.

"So, you think **I'm** doing something stupid, which makes it none of your business!" Daniel retorted.

"No, I definitely think it's the Colonel who's being stupid, because..." Sam started.

"I'm going to have to ask you to watch your use of the terms 'dumb' and 'stupid,' Sam," Daniel said.

"Okay, 'stupid' is an unfortunate choice of word, but..."

"Yes, it is," Daniel seethed. "If anything here is stupid, it's the regulations, not Jack. This is **my** apartment, and I won't have you..."

"Whoa! Easy there, big fella," Jack interrupted, moving to the back of Daniel's chair and starting to knead Daniel's shoulders. "Deep breath. Count to ten." Jack looked at Sam. "Y'know, Carter, if I were you I'd back off before we get an opportunity to observe the enraged archaeologist in his native habitat... I hear it's always safer to see them on PBS..."

"Colonel, I'm not enjoying this any more than you are, but regulations..." Sam sighed, and briefly considered transferring to NASA.

"O'Neill is in love with DanielJackson," Teal'c announced. "Those regulations are based on prejudice."

"I'm not talking about them both being men!" Sam exclaimed. "I mean Jack being Daniel's superior officer. There are reasons--good reasons--why relationships with a superior officer are against regulations."

"I'm a civilian!" Daniel objected.

"Semantics. Sophistry! You're wandering around, armed, in a uniform, in dangerous situations. Under a military commander. If your being a civilian changes things, it makes them worse."

"What am I going to do, Carter? Get overprotective? Not treat the civilian like just another one of the soldier boys? I think there are good reasons civilians are exempt from said regulations--they already get special treatment," Jack snapped. "As for the 'impaired judgement' issue, what's going to impair my judgment worse: being involved with a team member, or having some horrible tragic unrequited love for a team member while I wait to retire? I suspect that if we had decided that we weren't laying a hand on each other until I retire, at which point it's Vermont here we come, which, believe me, would be sooner rather than later, it would be worse. Much worse."

Sam felt a little better. She wasn't fully convinced it wasn't wrong, but at least there was no being shoved into an incoming wormhole in the Colonel's future. She even surprised herself a little by being happy for Daniel. If anyone here deserved happiness, it was Daniel.

"I'm a little offended that apparently Jack is adult enough to take responsibility for his decisions, but I'm not. If you want to yell at someone, yell at me." Daniel sighed. "You know, Jack, it's hard to be enraged with you massaging all the tension out of my shoulders like that."

"That's the plan."

"It's not..." Sam protested. "I just think that, well, we can't function without you!"

"I think you're exagerrating my importance," Daniel said dismissively.

"I don't," Jack contradicted. "You've saved our butts how many times? This program wouldn't even exist without you. Hell, I would be dead if it weren't for you."

Sam cheered internally.

"We've all saved each other's lives, Jack," Daniel pointed out.

"You know what I mean," Jack said softly.

Daniel tilted his head to stare up at Jack. "Oh." He knew, and he was still the only one on the team who did know the whole truth about Jack and that first mission to Abydos.

"'Oh.'" Jack snorted amusedly as the metaphorical lightbulb lit up, and added, "You're cute." He looked at Teal'c and Sam. "Everyone getting this? You want to take notes?"

Sam looked at the floor, embarrassed.

"I am debating your side of the issue," Teal'c noted.

"Yes, and thank you, Teal'c, we appreciate your support," Daniel said.

Teal'c inclined his head solemnly.

"What if Daniel gets injured off-world?" Sam persisted.

"You mean what if I fall down and skin my knee?" Daniel asked drily. "Will Jack have to hold up the proceedings to kiss my boo-boo? Why aren't you asking me if **I'm** going to kiss Jack's boo-boos? Jack's every bit as capable of skinning his knee as I am, you know."

"Daniel," Jack said, warningly, "you are **not** kissing my boo-boos." _Not in public, anyway._

"That's what **you** think," Daniel retorted.

"Daniel..." Jack growled threateningly.

"Jack?"

"You are **not** kissing my boo-boos!"

"Am so!"

"Are not!"

"Am so!"

"Daniel!"

"How about if I wait until Teal'c and Sam leave before I kiss your owies and make them better?" Daniel batted his eyelashes.

"Wow, this conversation is verging on too much information." Sam was going to need a little time and space before she thought this was cute.

Jack sighed heavily. "You turning me in, Carter?"

"What?" Sam asked. "No!"

"So what do you want from us? Early retirement? Reassignment?"

"I'm just saying you need to consider the impact of your decision on the team."

"Point taken," Jack said dismissively.

"I'm just trying to do my job. If it was just me being Daniel's friend I'd be happy for him. You two don't have to bite my head off."

"Um, at the risk of being rude, who was calling whom 'stupid'?" Daniel retorted.

"Point taken." Sam sighed. "You want me to leave?"

"What? No!" Daniel exclaimed contritely. Sam managed a smile at that.

"Oh, for crying out loud, Carter! We want you to quit overreacting!"

Sam decided Colonel O'Neill was an insensitive lout. Daniel was too good for him. Oh, well, she couldn't really fault Daniel for his taste, it would be too much like the pot calling the kettle black. Sam and Jack exchanged dirty looks.

Jack wondered what the hell Carter's problem was. She'd said just last week that she'd never lay a finger on either him or Daniel. Now she was all bent out of shape because they were together. Was there some subtext he had missed? Or was it really regulations? Either way, he could tell he was supposed to **know**. He decided to chalk it up as more evidence that he sucked at this stuff. At least he and Daniel were from the same friggin' planet... most of the time.

"So, are we still playing 'Truth or Dare'?" Daniel asked after the silence showed no sign of being broken by either Jack or Sam. There was a pause while everyone looked at each other. "I have no more blackmail material to be revealed. How about you, Jack?"

"Oh, I'm fresh out of deep, dark secrets."

"Is everyone too uncomfortable to go on?" Daniel asked. "Or shall we continue towards the inevitable terminal embarrassment?"

An evil grin spread across Jack's face. "I do kind of like having an excuse to ask you obnoxious personal questions."

"You don't need one," Daniel said.

Jack and Daniel exchanged a long look. Sam blushed.

Jack noticed Sam watching them and decided to change the subject. "So, whose turn is it?" Jack asked.

"Does this mean we're playing?" Daniel asked.

"I haven't picked on you enough," Jack commented.

"You've been picking on me all night. I may have to retaliate."

"Oh, fine. Retaliate away. I'm not scared of you... Whose turn is it, anyway?"

"Truth or dare, Jack?" Daniel asked, smiling dangerously.

"Oh, shit! Mayday! Going down in flames!" Jack exclaimed in mock-terror. "I **so** know I'm going to regret this either way... Dare." Jack's snickering contradicted his attempt to look frightened.

"Kiss my feet," Daniel dared, extending his bare feet gracefully towards Jack.

"You're not serious," Jack said in flat disbelief.

"I'm completely serious."

Jack muttered, "Carter, next time I suggest playing 'Truth or Dare,' shoot me."

Daniel wiggled his toes at Jack and eyed him expectantly. Teal'c raised an eyebrow. Sam looked like a deer in the headlights.

"Wow. How did I not notice you're this evil?" Jack asked Daniel.

"I'm deceptively cute and cuddly," Daniel answered.

"Well, I'm **not** kissing your feet in front of Carter and Teal'c."

"Thank you, sir," Sam effused with heartfelt gratitude.

"Why not?" Daniel asked innocently.

"Spare me the innocent act. I know better."

"So, I guess if you refuse, the game is over."

"Guess so."

"Wow, I'm tired. Maybe we should all turn in." Daniel batted his eyelashes at Jack.

"Here's a quarter, kids. Go to the movies or something," Jack growled, without taking his eyes off Daniel.

"Teal'c, I think we should go before the floor show starts," Sam observed. "Although if you're handing out money, sir, I could use a few dollars for Daniel's waistband..."

"Carter..." Jack growled threateningly.

"We should depart now," Teal'c observed. "I grow concerned for your safety, Major Carter."

"Rent 'Men in Black,'" Daniel suggested. "I bet Teal'c would enjoy that. Thanks for coming over! We should do this again soon."

Sam considered that they should make an appointment to do this again just as soon as hell froze over.

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do! Nice talking to you." Jack practically shoved Sam and Teal'c out the door, then turned back to glare at Daniel. "'Kiss my feet'?"

Daniel beamed sweet mischief at Jack. "You were asking for it."

"Probably." Jack sighed. "I kind of wish I hadn't asked the virginity question."

"Why not?"

Jack made an annoyed sound.

"You're jealous? It was over ten years ago!"

Jack grumbled.

"You'd rather I'd saved myself for you?"

"I never claimed it was rational," Jack gruffly admitted to the floor. "Just don't tell me it was great sex. It's bad enough that it sounded romantic. And no one is going anywhere near your waistband but me!"

"Trust me, I'm a hundred percent with you on that one."

"As for the bar conversation, you kind of trailed off right when it was getting interesting. Sex isn't about... what?"

"It's not about anything I can get from a stranger."

"I'm glad you can get it from me," Jack murmured softly.

Daniel lowered his eyes, then glanced up through his lashes. "Come here," he murmured.

Jack dizzily took a step towards Daniel, then stopped. Daniel smiled, that sweet, dazzling smile, and inclined his head towards the bedroom. He turned and led the way, turning back to see if Jack was following. Jack was definitely following.

Daniel climbed onto the bed and beckoned. Jack scrambled into bed next to him and was promptly flipped onto his back, his hips straddled and his arms held down.

"Hey!" Jack protested teasingly.

He was silenced by Daniel's mouth covering his in a burning kiss until he was breathless and dizzy. The Daniel leaned back, watching Jack with sweet mischievous hunger as he fiddled with his shirt buttons, watching Jack's eyes.

Jack lay back and watched, breathing heavily. If Daniel wanted to put on a private striptease, who was Jack to object?

Daniel drank in the raw, naked lust in Jack's eyes as he slowly, silently unbuttoned his shirt and languidly slipped it off. He reached down to his pants, then smiled, all feral sweetness. "Shall I keep going?"

Jack growled. "I can rip them off with my teeth," he offered.

"How thoughtful! but it's really not necessary," Daniel teased, unbuttoning his pants.

"It's no trouble," Jack reassured, licking his lips.

Daniel started slowly unzipping. "Oh, you're too kind. I'd hate to be an inconvenience." He squirmed his way out of his pants, dropping them on the floor, and resumed his position on Jack's lap in his underwear, beaming and wriggling.

"Oh, don't stop on my account," Jack said.

"What, these?" Daniel asked, fingering the waistband of his underwear.

"Uh-huh." _Pricktease._

"They don't seem to fit very well, do they?" Daniel asked, slipping his fingers inside to stroke himself lightly.

Jack flinched and let out a strangled groan.

"You said something about tearing things off with your teeth?" Daniel said coyly.

Jack reached up to remove the offending undergarment. Daniel rose up helpfully on his knees, then allowed Jack to push him onto his back. Jack slipped the underwear down luscious legs and tossed them over his shoulder, the crawled up Daniel's body for a kiss, long legs and arms wrapping around him, pulling him closer.

"Not fair!" Daniel observed petulantly, tugging Jack's shirt up, Jack smirking and allowing Daniel to pull his shirt off and peeling off the rest himself before moving down to settle between Daniel's legs.

"I've never done this before, so no laughing," Jack warned before an experimental lick along the underside of Daniel's shaft, pausing at that spot at the base of the head that was one of his favorite spots. He was rewarded by Daniel's arched back and quickened breathing, fingers caressing his head as Daniel murmured little wordless endearments. Wow. One of Daniel's legs wrapped itself around his shoulder, foot caressing his back. Jack tried the licking again, and Daniel moaned and arched in such an encouraging way that he just slipped easily into Jack's mouth. Jack decided to try a little sucking, and Daniel's moan was so amazing that Jack decided that he really could get to like doing this a lot. Definitely.

Slowly, Jack reminded himself; Daniel liked it slow. He slowed his explorations down as much as self-control allowed and Daniel seemed to go out of his mind with pleasure. Jack didn't think he'd been this horny or hard since he was a teenager. Doing this to Daniel, dear God, it was so fucking erotic to watch him moan and wriggle and writhe and know that HE was doing that. Jack was having so much, well, **fun** that he was surprised by Daniel's orgasm. Pleasantly so, he decided, if a bit disappointed that it was over for now.

"You were lying about this being your first time," Daniel accused breathily, still panting.

"Nope," Jack denied smugly.

"You... you're **unbelievably** talented," Daniel observed dazedly.

"Keep up the positive reinforcement and you won't be able to keep me off you," Jack teased, moving up Daniel's body to hold him. "Which could get embarrassing during all those boring briefings, although it would certainly liven things up..." he mused.

"Jack!"

Jack smirked and pulled Daniel close. "Mine," he said smugly.

"Mm hmm," Daniel agreed.

"I wish I could make an announcement. Rent a billboard. Skywrite. 'Daniel Jackson is mine, mine, mine!' Just think how jealous people would be!"

"If you say so."

"Y'know, if you're too tired to finish me I think I could fuck the floor right about now," Jack commented. "No, really. Take me like a runaway train."

"Actually, I wouldn't object if you wanted to, um, take **me** like a runaway train."

"I thought I... oh!" Jack said, hoping he wasn't blushing.

"Of course, if you don't like that idea I'm sure we can come up with others that don't involve you making mad, passionate love to the floor," Daniel offered solicitously. "You ever, um...?"

"Yeah, I..." Jack trailed off. "Should I not go into details?"

"'Cast of thousands'?" Daniel teased. "I kind of assumed..."

"Smartass," Jack observed.

"So, you want to, um..."

"Kinda."

"'Kinda'? Not a very enthusiastic response."

"She hollered that it hurt and we stopped," Jack said in a small, embarrassed voice.

"Oh," Daniel said. "I'm sorry!" There was a brief, uncomfortable pause. "It's okay; you're not going to hurt me," he reassured Jack.

Jack looked up hopefully. "You're sure?"

"As long as you're willing to, um, accept suggestions..."

Jack shrugged. "Whatever you say, punkin. After all, I yub you."

"Take me like a runaway train!" Daniel cheered, retrieving a bottle of lube from his nightstand drawer and handing it to Jack.

"You can do worse than that," Jack challenged. "I just called you 'punkin,' the least you can do is retaliate."

"Take me like a marine after a four-day bender!"

"You want me to fall asleep on you?"

"Okay, maybe not. Take me like an enraged rhinoceros?"

"I'm gonna take you like the energizer bunny on acid!"

"Where do you want me when you take me like a coked-up Tasmanian Devil? Flat on my back? Flat on my front?"

"Flat on your back," Jack said unhesitatingly. "With your legs wrapped around me. I want to see you while I take you like an oompa-loompa on crack!" _And kiss you._

Daniel grinned, squirming into position in front of Jack and pulling a pillow under his hips. "Take me like a used car salesman!"

"Ouch!" Jack observed wryly. Daniel giggled and beamed up with an sweet smile. "Um, you **are** planning on telling me if I'm doing this wrong, aren't you?"

"Oh, don't worry," Daniel said, in a tone of false reassurance. "If you do it wrong I'll just whip up a power point presentation and..."

Jack let out a mock scream of terror.

"Jack, I promise; if I don't like what's happening I'll let you know. Feel better?"

"Much," Jack said, trying to judge entry angles and moving into position.

"You do realize that you probably shouldn't just, y'know, stick that in there, don't you?" Daniel interrupted. "It isn't wham, bam, thank you, Dan. The office hasn't been opened for business."

"What?" _No runaway train?_

"Well, it's been awhile and I'm probably out of practice... You should definitely start with your fingers."

"Fingers." _Jesus, Danny, I'm DYING here..._

"Yes, fingers. Actually, finger singular to start with... Um, okay, I don't suppose you could make it any less like you're pressing a doorbell, could you?"

"Geeze. Have a **little** consideration for my ego, will ya?"

"Sorry, Jack." Daniel sighed. "Oh!" he gasped.

"More like it, huh?"

"Mm hmm."

"Wanna try for two?"

"Mm hmm." Daniel squirmed sensuously as Jack slipped two fingers inside him. "Mmmm," he moaned.

"Mm," Jack answered.

"Definitely mm!"

"Okay, so does 'mm' mean I should keep doing this, try for three, or cut to the chase?"

"It may be runaway train time," Daniel replied.

"Woohoo!" Jack cheered, slipping his fingers out and moving into position. "Dammit, I can't see what I'm..."

"Jack... more lube."

"Already dripping from the ceiling here."

"More lube!"

"Geeze, fine."

"Okay ...a little to the... Ow!"

"How can it be 'ow' if I didn't even get it in yet?"

"Poking harder doesn't make it the right spot, Jack," Daniel complained. "Sorry. Um, why don't I, um, line it up for you? Your angle is just completely wrong."

Jack sighed heavily. "Go ahead," he said, sounding distinctly martyred.

Daniel shifted position. "Right there." When Jack hesitated, he grabbed Jack's hips and gently guided him in. All the way in.

"Oh... **fuck** yeah!" Jack groaned, dropping his head against Daniel's shoulder, nuzzling at the warm, glistening skin.

"Um, Jack? Runaway train?" Daniel prodded, running his fingers through Jack's hair and kissing the top of his head.

Nodding, Jack tried a gentle thrust and waited for the 'ow.' Instead, he got an enthusiastic moan. Clear encouragement to try that again. Another, longer, harder, but still careful thrust. Another moan.

"It's okay. It's wonderful. Go ahead," Daniel encouraged breathlessly.

Jack was still nervous about the whole 'runaway train' thing; Sara said it hurt like hell, and while Daniel didn't seem to be feeling any pain he wasn't about to push his luck by going all 'runaway train' on Danny. On the other hand, this was just about the hottest, tightest, silkiest, most erotic place he'd ever...

"Don't you make me come up with something worse than 'punkin' to call you," Daniel threatened. "You know I can."

"Can not," Jack retorted, thrusting.

"Can so," Daniel gasped.

"Not, not, not!" Jack retorted, punctuating each word with his hips. "Oh, **God**, Danny!"

"Jack!" Daniel's hands grasping his shoulders, Daniel bracing himself against Jack now. Maybe not 'runaway train' but definitely a rhythm now, building as Jack found himself mustering reserves of self-control he didn't know he had to avoid pounding Daniel right through the bed and into the floor, not a single doubt in his mind as to whether Daniel was enjoying this or not. Probably not a doubt in the neighbors' minds, either; Jack was probably going to end up hoarse, not that he could care less, and Daniel wasn't quiet. Faster now, and harder, and okay, this probably qualified as 'runaway train' but all that noise Daniel was making sounded nothing whatsoever like "ow." And then there was sweet completion and wet warmth and his face in that wonderful curve between Daniel's neck and shoulder.

Petting. Daniel was petting him. Jack considered moving, then decided he liked it just fine where he was and settled for sighing happily.

"Remember what I said earlier about your being incredibly talented?" Daniel commented. Jack wanted to answer, but he was pretty sure his mouth didn't work. "You are, you know."

Jack snuggled his face further into Daniel's neck as an answer.


End file.
